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Today we’re kicking off Safe & Sound by talking about the one thing that best protects kids against child abuse: COMMUNICATION. And we can already hear you through the screen asking, “How do I do that?” We’ve adapted some strategies—courtesy of Dr. Amy Stoeber—to help parents and caregivers really TALK with kids of any age. So on Day 1, we’re going to take ten minutes and practice the super simple method to safeguard your child and strengthen your bond.
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And it’s as simple as it sounds. It takes ten minutes. You sit on the floor. You give your child your full attention. And then you let your child decide how they want to spend this magic time with you. Ten Minute Floor Time works best when you approach it as an almost-daily practice. It may take several days (or weeks!) before your child adapts to this new routine. And it may be even longer before your child trusts that they can really open up and ask or tell you anything. Good communication doesn’t happen overnight. You need to lay a foundation. And Ten Minute Floor Time will help. So let’s get started! Read through the steps below, and then figure out when you can put Ten Minute Floor Time into action. Start tonight if you can. But if today already has a LOT going on, that’s okay. The important thing is to get familiar with how Ten Minute Floor Time works and figure out where it can fit in your family’s schedule.
1. Find a consistent time (every day or almost every day) during the week where you can take 10 uninterrupted minutes to be with your child. Just do your best, and recognize that some floor time is better than none. Aim for 3-4 times a week.
2. Pick a space where your child likes to hang out. It could be their room, the family room, or the kitchen table. What’s important is that the space feels comfortable for them. Try and make it the same space each time. For younger kids (10 and under) remove distractions, including phones and other devices. And be sure to switch off your phone so nothing’s distracting you.
3. Give your child control. Let your child know that for the next ten minutes, they get to guide this time. They can ask you to play a game. They can ask you to read to them. If your child isn’t sure what to do with this time, just sit and just be near them. If you have a tween or teen, you might just be in the room while they read, do school work, or just exist independently. (This will probably be the case the first few times.) They might show you a new social media profile or online game. For every age of child, let them know (without pressuring them) that they can talk to you about ANYTHING, which means they can also ask you ANY question. Nothing’s off limits.
4. Be honest. If your child does ask a question, be open and honest with your answers. This is how you build trust. If you don’t know an answer to a question, say so. And say you will find the answer together. 5. Keep it pressure-free. Don’t rush an activity. Don’t ask about grades or homework or their social life. If your child would rather play than talk, that’s ok! Play is still a form of communication. Focus on enjoying each other’s company.
To have a healthy relationship with your child, good communication is essential. And kids find comfort in the routine of an activity like 10 Minute Floor Time. The more comfortable you and your child are talking, especially with “taboo” topics, the stronger your bond will become.
That’s it for Day 1! See you tomorrow!
