The Children's Advocacy Center of Jackson County

Tag: nightmares

  • Making a difference in a child’s life

    By Tammi Pitzen, Executive Director of the Children’s Advocacy Center of Jackson County

    I often get asked to explain how the CAC works and what difference it really makes in the life of an abused child.

    I think my amazing seven your old son gave me the best story/metaphor to explain this.  He teaches me all sorts of new things on a daily basis.

    Recently he taught me about dream catchers.  He made a dream catcher and he was explaining what it does.  He told me that it catches the bad dreams and replaces them with good.

    I was intrigued and did a little research.  Dream catchers are a tradition of the Native American community.  It was believed that it would protect you from nightmares by having positive dreams slip through the hole in the center of the dream catcher and glide down the feathers to the sleeping person below.  The nightmares would get caught up in the web and disappear when the first rays of sun stuck them.

    This concept is the very thing that the CAC model does for abused children.  Only the web is catching abuse and hopefully stopping it as we bring it out into the open and “shed light” on the issue. 

    The Children’s Advocacy Center model (CAC) is built on the concept of the multidisciplinary team.  Each agency that has a role in the investigation and intervention into child abuse, works together to meet the needs of the child at the heart of said investigation.  These agencies include law enforcement, Department of Human Services, mental health providers, forensic interviewers, medical providers, prosecutors, and advocates.

    Each team member represents a strand in the web of the dream catcher doing their part to change the predicted outcome for the abused children we serve.  Each service provided does a little to bring safety to a child. 

    We all change the trajectory of an abused child’s life by putting in place services that will help stop the abuse and replace it with healing. What a beautiful gift to give to a child who has been abused!

    The CAC puts a great big spot light on child abuse and hopefully by doing this we can make it stop.  Much like the dream catcher holds bad dreams in its web until the sun rays hit them and make them disappear.

    We provide a holistic approach to the intervention, investigation and prosecution of child abuse.  We provide medical evaluation, diagnosis and treatment, therapeutic interventions, forensic interviewing and advocacy and support services for children 0 to 18 who have been victims of abuse or witness to violent crimes.

    These services are so needed in order to not only stop the damage of abuse but to repair the damage caused by abuse.

    These services literally save lives.

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

  • A chance for healing for boys who are victims of sexual abuse

    cropped-Sacred-Ground3
    Sacred Ground Kapalua, Maui. This lone tree stands watch over the spirits buried there

    By Randy Ellison, Speaker, writer and author of the book Boys Don’t Tell: Ending the Silence of Abuse

    As I hear the many inspiring stories of healing that are told during Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM), I’m reminded of an amazing experience I had a few years ago.

    I was invited to give a presentation to a small group of boys who had experienced sexual abuse …….age 10-13. I was nervous at the prospect of sharing with young survivors. I wasn’t sure what to put together in the way of a presentation. I always plan, plan, plan, and then plan some more before I do a presentation (anal retentive I think they call it!). Well for the first time in my life it just didn’t seem appropriate to prepare in advance. I thought I would know what to say when the time came.

    I happened to watch a TED presentation from Brené Brown on shame that day, which was really about vulnerability. She shared that vulnerability is not really weakness as we perceive, but is in fact strength. When we expose ourselves as flawed and are willing to show our vulnerability, it is truly admirable and it opens the door for others to do the same. Well this is the theme I took to the boys. My entire preparation was based on a few words.

    “…vulnerability is not really weakness as we perceive, but is in fact strength.”

    • Vulnerability
    • Control
    • Secrets
    • Shame
    • Alone
    • Not good enough
    • Me first (to heal we must)

    I’ll let you put your own meaning to each of these words.

    When I arrived I was informed that the boys did not generally talk in the group about having been victimized. It was more of a peer support group. I started by sharing that I had been sexually abused, by whom, when and for how long. I went on to share what it did to my life by not dealing with it. I then told them about the amazing things that had happened since I began to tell my truth. We talked about the words above and what they meant to me and what they might mean to them.

    By the end of the time at least three of the boys had shared personal experiences and feelings about what happened to them. One boy, age 11, told me about being ridiculed by a teacher for stuttering. His classmates were even harsher. As a foster child, how he cherished the times he was allowed to see his parents. Another boy, age 12, told me he attempted to commit suicide by taking pills, but now he takes pills that help him get through the day. A third boy shared that he was abused the way I was, and sometimes he has nightmares and wakes up scared in the middle of the night.

    I wrapped it up with how lucky they were to have a group and a place like they were at to help them heal so they would not grow up with the problems I had. They had the opportunity to heal and become whole if they chose to and worked hard. I left with a broken heart for the pain these children are suffering, and praying that they will go on to live healthy lives with the help they are getting at a young age.

    It was such an honor to spend time with these boys who are crying out to be heard, loved and understood. Any chance you may have to step in and become a mentor or Big Brother/ Big Sister to a child like these, you will find you are doing heaven’s work. It is amazing how a little time and effort can mend a broken soul. May you be as blessed as I was that evening.

    randy-thumbSpeaker, writer and author of the book Boys Don’t Tell: Ending the Silence of Abuse, Randy Ellison is a child-sexual-abuse, victim’s advocate and an activist promoting cultural change working with local, state and national organizations. Randy also works as a consultant for nonprofits dealing with awareness and prevention of intimate violence. He addresses abuse prevention and healing for survivors from a survivor’s perspective. Randy is a member of the Oregon Attorney General’s Sexual Assault Task Force. He maintains his own website boysdonttell.com